how disappointing

i recently remarked after reading two of rené descartes' meditations that i may be reading the words of a genius. then i came across this:

"...i can infer both that god exists and that i am completely dependent on him for my existence from moment to moment. this inference is so obvious that i'm sure humans can't know anything more evidently or certainly. and now i think i see a way of moving from the contemplations of the true god, in whom are hidden all treasures of knowledges and wisdom, to knowledge of other things."

i feel like the more i hear about god the less i believe in him.